(You've read this before. This is why this is a blog - It's, continuously, on my mind. It's about me.)
I keep going back and forth. Blog this, blog that. I'll concentrate on being a screenwriter, but I love "novel writing". Short Stories.
Conflicted? Shit! I'm torn.
I started to edit a work in progress. I have many "work in progresses" (that's another blog, finishing an actual story). It may be a short story, it may turn out to be a novel. I even though it would be great as a fictional blog (a.k.a. Diablo Cody). Regardless, my red ink almost ran out on page number two, correcting errors.
Discouraged.
I understand writing, as a career, is hard. I also know I'm a neophyte when it comes to writing. Most writers spend several years, decades even, learning their craft, novel after novel, screenplay after screenplay, rejection after rejection. I know it won't be easy. The problem I'm experiencing is that those writers chose one craft over the other. I know I can do both, but I also know I can't do both until I choose one, and then commit to it.
With screenplays, I am so particular with the actual words. I'm not talking about structure or story. I'm talking about what it will take to distinguish myself from all the other screenwriters - the importance of the first 10 pages, characters that we haven't seen before, descriptions that bursts off the page (but not longer than 4 paragraphs), why I used the word burst when I should have chosen a different word, etc...
With "novel writing", there are so many G.D. words. I can write paragraph after paragraph, sentence after sentence. I can go to bed thinking that I made progress. Shit, I wrote three "strong" pages. Then I'm awoken at night because those fucking commas have come into my dreams, turning them into nightmares. (I rewrote that last sentence over five times. Should I have placed the comma after "Then" and/or after "night"? No comma?)
I don't think of crap like that when I write screenplays. There aren't any possessive singular nouns, parenthetical expressions, conjunctions, independent clauses, etc... There is a picture, a setting, characters pursuing something, and dialogue.
But....
I can't describe everything in detail in screenplays. Context becomes harder to write. Actions, even the smallest act, taking up one line on a page, tells more about character than a page, or more, in long hand. Maybe that sentence of dialogue shouldn't be in the screenplay? Maybe the character should say that later in the screenplay - maybe not at all. (is that okay to do the dash there?)
I'm going to try an analogy on you. Here we go...
We would all love to have someone clean up after ourselves. Life sure would be easier. It would be like staying at a hotel, each and every day. Who cares if you stain a wash cloth with red wine, leave a half empty pizza box over a day on the carpet, dribble your, overflowing, new cup of coffee on the carpet and never think twice about it, or leave a toilet bowl full of shit that didn't go down the toilet, because the, quote, housekeeper will get to it in the morning, etc...
Believe me, I have your ecterrera for you. Did I say I spend my day, away from writing, taking care of a housekeeping department at a hotel? You stupid slobs. Common cleanliness skills you acquired after third grade would sure help me (I'm thinking of myself) and my staff.
(comma after "skills" and "grade"?)
I keep going back and forth. Blog this, blog that. I'll concentrate on being a screenwriter, but I love "novel writing". Short Stories.
Conflicted? Shit! I'm torn.
I started to edit a work in progress. I have many "work in progresses" (that's another blog, finishing an actual story). It may be a short story, it may turn out to be a novel. I even though it would be great as a fictional blog (a.k.a. Diablo Cody). Regardless, my red ink almost ran out on page number two, correcting errors.
Discouraged.
I understand writing, as a career, is hard. I also know I'm a neophyte when it comes to writing. Most writers spend several years, decades even, learning their craft, novel after novel, screenplay after screenplay, rejection after rejection. I know it won't be easy. The problem I'm experiencing is that those writers chose one craft over the other. I know I can do both, but I also know I can't do both until I choose one, and then commit to it.
With screenplays, I am so particular with the actual words. I'm not talking about structure or story. I'm talking about what it will take to distinguish myself from all the other screenwriters - the importance of the first 10 pages, characters that we haven't seen before, descriptions that bursts off the page (but not longer than 4 paragraphs), why I used the word burst when I should have chosen a different word, etc...
With "novel writing", there are so many G.D. words. I can write paragraph after paragraph, sentence after sentence. I can go to bed thinking that I made progress. Shit, I wrote three "strong" pages. Then I'm awoken at night because those fucking commas have come into my dreams, turning them into nightmares. (I rewrote that last sentence over five times. Should I have placed the comma after "Then" and/or after "night"? No comma?)
I don't think of crap like that when I write screenplays. There aren't any possessive singular nouns, parenthetical expressions, conjunctions, independent clauses, etc... There is a picture, a setting, characters pursuing something, and dialogue.
But....
I can't describe everything in detail in screenplays. Context becomes harder to write. Actions, even the smallest act, taking up one line on a page, tells more about character than a page, or more, in long hand. Maybe that sentence of dialogue shouldn't be in the screenplay? Maybe the character should say that later in the screenplay - maybe not at all. (is that okay to do the dash there?)
I'm going to try an analogy on you. Here we go...
We would all love to have someone clean up after ourselves. Life sure would be easier. It would be like staying at a hotel, each and every day. Who cares if you stain a wash cloth with red wine, leave a half empty pizza box over a day on the carpet, dribble your, overflowing, new cup of coffee on the carpet and never think twice about it, or leave a toilet bowl full of shit that didn't go down the toilet, because the, quote, housekeeper will get to it in the morning, etc...
Believe me, I have your ecterrera for you. Did I say I spend my day, away from writing, taking care of a housekeeping department at a hotel? You stupid slobs. Common cleanliness skills you acquired after third grade would sure help me (I'm thinking of myself) and my staff.
(comma after "skills" and "grade"?)
That ended up being a rant. Anyways, back to my point. Life is hard. Those careers you choose, especially at an older age, are not going to be easy. You may have to go back to square one to be a novel writer. That means going back to school, taking classes. I don't have enough time to write, how the hell am I going to take English classes on top of that?
Life's hard. An unpaid writer's life is hard. Whichever path I choose, I must choose one. I don't believe there is an option unless your earned that option.
Done spellchecking
Life's hard. An unpaid writer's life is hard. Whichever path I choose, I must choose one. I don't believe there is an option unless your earned that option.
Done spellchecking
1 comment:
I have the opposite problem; dialogue is difficult for me.
However, after reading many, many screenplays, it's getting better.
It sounds to me though that you're being very hard on yourself. Relax. Take a break and clear your head then pick up the pen again.
I barely have enough time to write myself as my career takes up a lot of my time but I try not to panic. I try not to look at the clock & the calendar only to realize it's been a month since I last wrote. When I do that, I don't write anything as I'm too hung up on the 'failure'.
Also, it sounds to me that you really love the art of screenplay writing so why not focus more there? Why worry about the novel? Do what you love!
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