AH HA moment

I have been struggling lately. Every time I would sit down at my computer and look a screenplay I am trying to write, or working on a prior script of mine, I would just sit there disgusted at what I was looking at. The format of a screenplay just bugged me. It was action line after action line, dialogue after dialogue. Nothing was coming out of me and if it did, it was shit.

If you’re thinking this is writers block, it’s not. During this time I have been writing short story after short story. Finding something to write has never been a problem for me. The problem is that I want to be a screenwriter, not a short story or novel writer. Usually when I have some sort of situation like this (usually it only lasts a couple days) I would do one of two things. The first thing that usually works for me is to watch movies. Movies, seeing what your ultimate goal is - your screenplay on screen - almost always pulls me out of the couch and puts me right back where I belong, the computer. Unfortunately for me, every movie I watched or started to watch just sucked, drawing me deeper into my temporary hatred for the screenplay format and everything about grinding out story (writing) is all about.

The second thing that usually helps me get out of my doldrums, is reading other people’s screenplays (www.simplyscripts.com is a great website to read screenplays of your favorite movies). The first screenplay I was able to read all the way through made me even more frustrated because it was something that I could have written, and in my view the two screenplays I have completed were every bit as good as the one that was made into this movie. Upon further reading of screenplays that were made into movies, I just couldn’t finish them. Once again the screenplay format (action lines and dialogue) just made me sick, I lost interest, resulting in trying a different screenplay until finally I gave up.

At this point I didn’t want anything to do with screenwriting. I even tried to read some articles, and that didn’t help. I would throw the magazines down and watch TV. This is murder for writers - not writing. Writing is my profession. I haven’t made a dime, and there is a very good possibility that I never will, but it is my profession. I have a job that puts food on the table and pays for the energy that allows this computer to be on as I write this, but I am always thinking about writing and story telling (if only those employees of mine understood this and left me alone).

The Ah-ha moment.

I dug into my closet about a week ago and pulled out the first book I ever bought on screenwriting. I pulled it out and it ended up sitting on my coffee table or next to me on my bed for that time, until today. The chapter I started to read was about screenplay structure. After reading about half of the chapter, I was BACK. I couldn’t wait to get to my computer and actually look at my screenplay. It has really given me a kick in the butt to look at the rewrite I’m working on and it has given me hope that the recent screenplay I gave up on, may have a possible resurrection. This brought me to thinking about life in general. No matter what you do for a living, everybody needs to look at things in a different light. Going through the motions and accepting things for the what they are and/or hoping it will get better (it never does unless you do something about it) never ends up being the right choice.

Now for my advice to you. It never hurts to even do the smallest thing that gets you out of the routine of life and even the pressure life gives us every day. Even if it means taking a walk around the neighborhood, eating lunch outside on a street or a park bench, or not only taking a different way home from work, but to stop, pull off the road, and take a look at something beautiful. This usually helps in breaking routine. For me it was to drop everything I was doing wrong, stop thinking about how frustrated I was with the screenplay format (hoping it would end) and to look at things differently. Now I see action lines and lines of dialogue as gold. Words have more meaning now. Instead of glancing at words and reading sentences, they started to pop out at me. Without words, I am lost.